I spent Friday night sobbing into a shredded tissue! Won’t forget the face of the little girl, aged nine, who lost her mum to AIDS; left alone to raise her baby sister.
AIDS is barely mentioned these days in the West, so it’s easy to blank the millions of kids orphaned. Comic Relief is still highlighting this heart-rending reality. Thursday, I saw my friend Jamie Morris playing Billy Liar at the Davenham Players. Some will tut-tut cos I went out!
Having not been out socially in the evening since 2006, I felt very apprehensive. The Supermoon, almost full, lit my way as I tottered along in sequined pumps down Davenham’s Church Street. I’m not used to such freedom. Normally near Full Moon I’m trussed up in the cellar awaiting transformation.
Like thousands of other single parents, watching telly or reading a book before bed is my only leisure time.
I’ve never particularly been sociable, but now I’ve got no chance! It was a boon the play was superb, the actors gave a real sense of family relationships and the set was brilliantly authentic.
Pop along to see the next production they do if you can. Tickets are cheap and the building is cosy.
Going out reminded me that I’m a person as well as a mum.
Before my little one was born, I was a muddy puddle on life’s public footpath. She saved my soul, but parenting is non-stop hard work, it’s draining, it’s often frustrating (you know your child has won when you’re the one whining in Sainsburys) and it’s often completely disgusting too! I think free PTSD counselling and wet wipes ought to be the human right of all parents. It’s a good job babies are cute. Nature is not stupid.
It does get easier though. Sort of.
Northwich is a bit short on help for lone parents. There is no longer any Gingerbread. I put forward that we start our own Single Parent Group – we could share babysitting, meet for days out or picnics in the park, give each other some support.
Who is up for it?
There are some organisations that can help though. I recommend googling One Parent Families website and also Single With Kids. (Beware SWK is disparaging and bigoted towards younger single parents or working class parents, but they do offer very cheap holidays with other single parent families, a dating service and a friendship chatroom.) I can also recommend Home Start West Cheshire for any parent with a child under 5 who is feeling overwhelmed for whatever reason.
Sadly, there isn’t a Home Start in Africa so it’s just as well Comic Relief was there to help the little girl in their film.
We must fight to keep these services alive because we are privileged they exist here and now in the UK.
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